By: Dion Hall
April 6th, 2025
Today in the UN crisis emerged, and the delegates responses? To be as unprepared as possible.
In ECOFIN it has been seen that a delegate was not wearing his western business attire. This is extremely preposterous in the UN, especially at times of crisis. In the same committee things got slightly out of hand causing the Dias to have to bang the javeil. The committee also just would not stop from asking the Dias about a dead body. keeping questions going on for minutes.
During all of this chaos a Financial Times writing expressed an completely unbiased opinion in Green Peace. His actions? He ripped up a picture of a plant and yelled “PLANTS ARE DOOMED” and then proceeded with “and your all financially illiterate”. These actions demonstrated how incapable Green Peace is as they did nothing to prevent the writer from saying and doing this though, what could they, as they are just a bunch of vegans.
In DISEC an alien was found to be somewhere among the delegates. immediately they began to target each other and shortly, the Russian Delegate, and the United States delegate were shot by the Dias. Some countries like Sudan think we should
NATO’s crisis occurred when a virus outbreak (LGM virus) occurred causing the death of civilians and soldiers. Russia proceeded to conduct a missile strike on a Lithuanian cruise ship and a NATO facility. They then proceeded to to march on Estonia. The Estonian delegate said in an interview ” it was an appalling action that is a clear declaration of war. A delegate spoke in defense of not launching nuclear weapons towards Russia or Russian allies. He reinforced this because of the “Dead Mans Hand” he said could “obliterate all major NATO settlements”. Canada told the rest of NATO not to fight within and instead to work together to show force against Russia. While all of this happens a delegate in the room was caught playing Clash Royal instead of paying attention to very intense speeches.
In the Canadian Senate delegates are trying to convince the room to migrate Canadians to Sri Lanka. this was met with large bangs on tables in favor of this. This comes after Pierre Poilievre was kidnapped, the plan? abandon ship. When told that “Emily sent me” the Dias just said “okay Good”. after this a update occurred where after the leader of the Conservative Party disappeared Conservatives have begun to start a civil war. In the room the conservatives have yet again said that they should unite and then they talked in bad faith against “Carbon Tax Carney”. Every delegate in the room was violent.